When it comes to planning a wedding, brides have an overabundance of resources and information. An overwhelming amount of apps, organizers, websites — it’s almost too much information.
But what about the bridal party — in particular, the MOH? The maid of honor is a very sacred and important bridal party distinction that comes with lots of planning. She is the bride’s confidant, her right-hand woman anticipating and planning for bridal success like a superhero.
She is the leader of the pack when it comes to the bridal party, organizing events such as the bachelorette party, ensuring all the ladies are ready for the big day and the bride is happy. Oh, and don’t forget about the big speech!
Although the many duties may feel overwhelming — and as if they might break the bank — with proper planning, organization, and a loving attitude you will be the best MOH ever.
1. Don’t expect a ‘thank you’
The bride already knows she can depend on you, being her maid of honor is not an exercise in proving your friendship to her. This is a time to be there 110% for her, forgiving her for the meltdowns that will occur and doing it all without expecting anything in return. There will come a time — most likely post-wedding — that the bride expresses her gratitude, but if you go into this thinking that every gesture, event or long night of favor making will be met with appreciation, take a step back. Remember that she has the world on her shoulders during this process, opinions and pressure from every angle. Be there for her as the best friend she knows you are.
2. Have an arsenal
At the bachelorette party, the rehearsal dinner and the morning of the wedding — pack a bag of items that will come to the rescue. High-string mother-of-the-bride? Chamomile tea and keep her away from the mimosas. Hung over bridal party? Coconut water and B12 vitamins, no time for sluggish maids at a time like this. Safety pins, a travel steamer and even a curling iron — come prepared as something will go wrong. The Knot has a great basic emergency kit list for the day-of too.
2. Have the bride give you everything
Especially if she does not have a wedding planner, take the reigns. Have her hand over contracts, the license and a list of photos she wants the photographer to take. She will be scattered and overwhelmed the day-of. Offer to have everyone go through you, if she rather keep her phone but not deal with the many texts — a groomsman forgot his tie — yes, she does NOT need to know that. When the photographer arrives asking where to start, you will already have the shot list for him and her detail items ready. Set out the rings, anything sentimental, the invitation and her shoes. It’s one more thing that could fall off her radar and she will be so happy to know you already thought of it.
Somehow, getting from the hotel to the ceremony or mom and dad arriving from their hotel to the church seems to get lost in the planning. Once hair and makeup appointments are set and before the full timeline is determined, work with your bride on the logistical items that could cause an issue.
1. Bride and groom’s parents: who is getting ready with the bridal party, who will need transportation from getting ready central to the ceremony and to the reception?
2. Bridal party: are they allowed to bring dates with on the transportation? Are the ring bearers and flower girls included on the transportation along with their parents? If not, provide ideas for alternative options — thanks, Uber!
3. Stuff: can you leave items on the transportation in-between photos, ceremony and before you head to the reception?
4. Bring the beats
For the bachelorette party and the day-of, create a mood appropriate playlist for the bride. Get the gals in the mood for fun before the last fling and some of her favorite chill songs for THE big morning. Even though the wedding day will fly by, there is going to be a lot of downtime. Make sure the bride eats, bring some healthy snacks and have magazines handy. When there is one hairdresser and nine bridesmaids, you will need it.